Tuesday, 15 January 2013

34 week midwife checkup

Wow, 3 posts in one week, how extra rambly am I!

  Just got back from a MW appointment and what a rude, nosey and uneducated woman she was! I haven't met her before as she is the team leader, and it doesn't help that she called me by the wrong name the whole time as it was clear she couldn't be bothered to read my notes properly, then she was getting mixed up as to why we were actually there (it was a routine appointment, that's all!) and then she was really very rude to my IM referring the baby as mine, reminding her that she would have no say in decisions and telling us off for not following protocol. I.e she didn't appreciate the news at the beginning of the pregnancy that my IPs were personal friends of her boss and we had already sorted the paper work, hospital plans and an induction date. She referred to it as "going through the back door" and "through friends of friends" and really, it was me that should be doing it all. Bad surrogate for being organised and using the resources I have to hand. Ha.

 Then when she was talking about the impact on my family with a silly pained expression on her face (she really doesn't like Surrogacy in general I thought) she asked me about the impact on my 'poor' husband and children and I burst in to tears. Oh dear. That was like fodder for her. If any of you know me though Fb, S and I separated over Christmas mainly down the surrogacy and how it was making him react/feel. Yes, there are other issues, and we are trying to sort this out through counselling but the timing of this and the main reason are not coincidental. So cue lots of blubbing with her sticky beaking and her fake niceties. I was an inspiration apparently and it must be so hard to be in so much pain for someone else, whilst it's my egg too but said like she was smug and not surprised. Ugh.
 To top it off, N and I left the office and she hugged me tightly and apologised for putting me through so much physical and emotional pain and that she loved me so much for doing this and she would never be able to thank me. Cue more crying again! I needed a good drink just to rehydrate myself.

And strangely now I feel so much better. Hearing those thank you's and likewise, the acknowledgement of the situation and an apology from N helped tremendously, then us walking arm in arm, laughing off the rude MW as two women together helped, and the little cry helped. And I am so determined to prove her and people like her wrong. Yes, it's hard, and it will get harder but I am proud and it will all be worth it. I have a new spirit of determination to knuckle down and get on to the delivery!

Health wise, baby is measuring 2 weeks ahead still so at least it isn't off the chart (despite the MW telling me I have put on too much weight and lay off eating too much 'healthy' food which I am eating to compensate the terrible Codeine constipation), she is head down, just hovering above the pelvis in readiness, BP was a good 120/55 and all my bloods and urine came back great.
So 4 weeks left fingers crossed! Bring it on!!!

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